February 3, 2026
What is a Sibling Doula? Podcast Episode #328
When families prepare for birth, so much focus is placed on supporting the birthing parent and partner. But what about older siblings?
In this solo episode with Kristin Revere, co-host of Ask the Doulas and founder of Gold Coast Doulas, we explore the role of a sibling doula and why this often overlooked form of support can make a meaningful difference for the entire family. A sibling doula provides emotional and practical care for older children during labor, birth, and the early postpartum period, helping them feel safe, included, and supported during a major life transition.
We discuss what a sibling doula does, what they do not do, and how their role differs from a traditional babysitter. You will learn how sibling doulas prepare children ahead of time, maintain routines, explain what is happening in age- appropriate ways, and support sibling introductions after birth.
This episode is especially helpful for families welcoming their first sibling, those without nearby support. Birth is not just a transition for parents. It is a big moment for siblings too, and thoughtful planning can help set the tone for a smoother adjustment.
This episode is brought to you by Ceres Chill, a company that never stops working to make the lives of parents easier! Use the promo code GOLDCOAST to receive 15% off your Ceres Chill order.
Welcome to Ask the Doulas!
First of all, what is a sibling doula? At Gold Coast, we have a specific role for a sibling doula, and that is usually supporting families at a homebirth, and our role is to support other children. Not knowing what time the birth will happen, if they will be awake, how the parents want to involve them in a home birth – I have had families hire us exclusively for the role of a sibling doula, and sometimes the role of a birth doula with the need to support other children if they wake, if they need a snack. So it could be a variety of emotional needs, as well as distraction needs at a home birth.
I have also supported a couple of families at a hospital birth where the sibling wanted to be involved, and I had a grandparent with me because I was primarily there to support my client, the mother, but also did involve her daughter and got her from the waiting room. She was able to see her sibling being born and was appropriately prepared before that happened by the parents, but I was not hired exclusively as a sibling doula.
Now, due to our liability insurance and our terms, we are not the typical sibling doula service where they are hired to be on call for a birth and be at the home without the families, the way a nanny or a babysitter would. And that could also be a planned surgical birth, a planned induction, where it’s mainly a childcare role. We do not offer that service. We need a parent to be in the home. But I know there are doulas who do, and there are some doula agencies that also have a babysitting service as part of their offerings. So oftentimes, that sibling doula role would be filled in that capacity as more of a sitter. But they are there essentially to bridge the gap between meeting the needs of the entire family as doulas, whether it’s a birth doula or a postpartum doula. We have our client, the mother, and we have the family that is our secondary client. So that could be other children. That could be the partner, or if a grandparent is involved, any other caregivers, again if it’s a homebirth or hospital birth.
And in our role as postpartum doulas, we have a bit of a different focus. And sometimes we are hired in the way a nanny might be to focus more on meeting the needs of other children. So as postpartum doulas, we could support siblings by getting them snacks, cleaning up around the house. We could certainly help with attention for the newborn, if the family wanted to spend time with siblings. But we’re not like a nanny in that we don’t pick up kids from school, and we won’t take them to dance class. We certainly aren’t going to be helping them with homework. But we will get them snacks. We will entertain them and support the entire family in their goals, which can be different day to day. Again, sometimes the need for the parent is to focus on the newborn or to get rest. And we certainly love to meet the siblings and the entire family, the partner, at the prenatal visit that our birth doulas have or at a consultation that our postpartum doulas have. We do have an intake form for both our birth and postpartum doula clients where we get into goals and other families who may need additional support and what that could look like. Again, things can change day to day, but that would be some of the focus: getting them snacks, playing with them if they have a toy set or a game they want to play; cleaning, helping them organize their rooms. So light household tasks; we’re not going to, say, clean a toilet. And we can accompany our clients as postpartum doulas to appointments. So say there is a pediatrician appointment, and there is a larger household. We could be there with the baby or if there are appointments or there’s a dance class and they want to bring along their postpartum doula, that is certainly something that we would offer at Gold Coast.
Now getting back to other traditional sibling doula services: the sibling doula will not replace the parents. They are not medical professionals in that capacity. Maybe a nurse or an RN who is a birth or postpartum doula might offer sibling support, but they’re not going to offer any medical information and will refer out to appropriate professionals. And that service – for us at Gold Coast, we work with families through the first year, so that service would again include other siblings up until that time. But we are not like a nanny or babysitter or mother’s helper that may have a longer timespan, especially nannies. They can work with families all the way through the school years. And we certainly can talk through things with them, if they are at the birth and have any confusion, and help them have some routines that are normalized that they had before the baby to keep structure and consistency in the household. We can help a bit with naps. We are more focused on the baby at Gold Coast, but I know some sibling doulas will help families with naptime. Many families still do hybrid or remote work since the pandemic, so families might have meetings where other children need attention in the home. Again, if children are homeschooled, we’re not going to run a homeschool curriculum the way a nanny would, especially one who is focused more on educational needs. And we certainly would never force a sibling to attend a birth. That’s between the parents and them, and if a sibling was not comfortable in the birth setting, then we would never make that happen.
But there are some differences between a sibling doula and a babysitter. A babysitter, again, is focused more on supervising the children. They are listening to a lot of instruction from the families on what they need. And they may have training in child development; they may not. They could be a mom. A babysitter might be bringing their own children, or the nanny might. But a sibling doula is more, like doulas in general, attuned to families’ needs. We’re more instinctual. We will certainly complete a to-do list if time allows. But we often take a look at the gaps and notice how we can best help. So we don’t necessarily focus on instruction or supervision. But we love including children in all of the things, like those postpartum follow-up visits for birth doulas, and we love to bring them little gifts if they’re the siblings who will be in the house during that point. We talk about how to meet their needs if there’s any sleep regressions. We have sleep consultants that work up to age 5 that can help with sibling adjustments to a new baby. Sometimes there are issues. I know with my own daughter, she was just starting to potty train. My son was born, and she had a regression with potty training. So it is up to the doula and their skill set and their comfort level, but sometimes we can help with different regressions. Those children who all of a sudden want to drop a nap and they’re not napping – we can help try to get some structure and routine in the household, where a babysitter may not. Nannies tend to be able to have more of those capabilities, but our goal is to help our families transition, and I strongly feel that birth and early parenting is a rite of passage. It can be different. Every baby is different. Every birth is different. And children’s needs can change in a moment. So a sibling doula, again, traditionally, would be the person on call for a birth and would stay in the home or help support other children in a home birth. But there are many other ways that birth and postpartum doulas or those that use the title sibling doula are able to help a family feel supported.
So if you’ve ever hired a sibling doula, I would love to hear how you utilized them, what your experience was, if you would do that again, and how it helped with the transition for the other child or children.
Take good care!
IMPORTANT LINKS
Birth and postpartum support from Gold Coast Doulas