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Gold Coast Doulas

May 2018

EcoBuns

Podcast Episode #26: EcoBuns Cloth Diapering

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On this episode of Ask the Doulas,  Marissa, owner of EcoBuns Baby + Co in Holland, Michigan dispels all the myths about cloth diapering that we’ve heard. Learn how easy and economical they can be for your family!  You can listen to the full podcast on iTunes or Soundcloud. 

 

Alyssa:  Hi, welcome to Ask the Doulas podcast with Gold Coast Doulas.  I am Alyssa Veneklase, co-owner and postpartum doula.  Today we’re talking to Marissa with EcoBuns Baby & Company again.  Last time we talked about her baby registry, and you mentioned cloth diapering and that the store actually started out as a cloth diapering store.  So I would like to hone in on cloth diapers today because I know there’s a lot of misconceptions and a lot of weird ideas.  In a lot of my classes, my newborn class and with a lot of the postpartum clients that I support, there’s the ick factor; there’s, “Isn’t it so expensive?” And I know you have a couple other things that you get asked a lot about it.  Let’s talk about some of those and dispel some myths.

Marissa:  Yes, are you ready?  Because I could talk about this all day long!

Alyssa:  Yes!  You have about 15 minutes.

Marissa:  Okay, I think we can condense it down.  So the first thing that you asked about is the ick factor of things, right?  That’s the first thing that people are like, oh my goodness, how am I going to cloth diaper?  We get asked that a lot by first-time parents, and I’m really sorry to say, first-time parents, you’re going to be dealing with ick with a new baby.  I don’t have a magic pill that makes Baby stop pooping.

Alyssa:  Right, whether it’s poop, pee, or puke, there’s always something coming.

Marissa:  There’s always something, yep, and I always say, oh, did you ever think when you were planning about future children that you’d ever have to sit down and have a conversation about choices of diapering?  You know, and so we always tell new parents – because that’s one of the biggest things is parents will say, I don’t want poop in my washing machine.  And what I say to them is, you’re going to have poop in your washing machine, whether it’s on the baby’s clothes because they’ve exploded out the sides of the disposable diaper, or inside of a cloth diaper.  Now, that being said, we don’t put actual baby poop that maybe people think of inside of the washing machine.  We do want to get rid of that before it goes into the washing machine, and there’s a couple ways.  We have liners; we have sprayers; there’s not the dunk and swish method that my mom and dad used.  There’s not a bucket of bleach water that my mom and dad, back in the ‘80s, soaked cloth diapers in.  Disposable liners are a really popular pick for parents who don’t want to deal with an ick factor.  You lay it on the diaper before you put the diaper on the baby.  When Baby poops, you can take that liner off and just dispose of the liner and wash the diaper.  So it makes it super convenient for any parent to do.

Alyssa:  So I’ve never seen the disposable liner.  Is it – obviously, biodegradable?  Better than a disposable diaper?

Marissa:  Biodegradable, yeah, absolutely.  It almost looks like a dryer sheet.  It’s very, very thin; if you hold it up, it’s very porous.  So all urine will go through it, but any solid waste is going to stay.

Alyssa:  So for a newborn baby, it’s not really –

Marissa:  Newborns, not even an issue.

Alyssa:  But once they’re older and eating solids?

Marissa:  Yeah, so usually the solid food transition is when people will gravitate towards the liners because – I always say that everyone wants you to feed your baby, but nobody talks about what the diaper changes are like after you start feeding your baby solid foods.

Alyssa:  It’s instantaneous, too.

Marissa:  Oh, my goodness.  First bite of food, and your life is completely changed.  So yeah, that’s a big factor.  The other thing that a lot of people come in to talk about is the cost factor of it.  You know, there is an upfront cost with cloth diapers, but what we look at is, people don’t necessarily realize how much disposable diapers cost because they’re spreading it out over time.  Your average Pampers are costing you around 28 to 30 cents per diaper change.  You’re going through 7,000 to 9,000 diaper changes from birth to potty training, so that can cost an average family upwards of $2,000.  If you’re using something like Bambo Nature or Honest Company, you’re going to spending closer to $4,200 from birth to potty training.  Cloth diapers, even if you’re going with the most expensive, all-organic, easiest-to-use solutions, you’re still probably looking at $1,800 to $2,000, but you can reuse them on future children.  And there are options that make it that you can go from birth to potty training for $150.  So it’s really where you want to be at.  The other cool thing with cloth diapering is it’s not an all or nothing thing.  You don’t have to come into EcoBuns and say, “Okay, Marissa.  I’m doing cloth diapers 100% of the time.”  We have so many families who come in and say, you know, when Grandma’s watching the baby, we’re going to do disposable diapers, or we travel a lot; we’re going to do disposable diapers when we travel.  It’s not an all or nothing kind of thing.  But the average family does save about $2,000 over the lifetime of their diapers.  What we say with cloth diapers is that if you use the cloth diaper for three months, you’ve broken even on the cost of it.

Alyssa:  Wow.

Marissa:  So huge cost savings there.  My eye doctor out at Complete Eye Health in Holland – he told me that he and his wife cloth diapered, and every week when they would have bought disposable diapers, they took those funds that they would have spent on disposable diapers and put it into a savings account.  At the end of their cloth diapering journey, they had enough money in their savings account to buy a brand-new high-efficiency washing machine and dryer; they had saved that much money.  So that’s huge.

Alyssa:  That’s amazing.

Marissa:  Yeah.  The other big thing that we talk about, too, is daycare because a lot of families will come in, and they’re like, we can’t cloth diaper because of daycare.

Alyssa:  That’s something I’ve never even thought of, but yeah, I can see where it’s a valid concern.

Marissa:  But in 2014, Michigan changed their daycare regulations, and if they’re a state-licensed daycare, they have to allow cloth diapers.  They can’t turn a child away because the parent is providing cloth diapers.  Now, there is a rule – there’s actually two rules inside of that.  One is that the daycare can’t reuse a portion of the diaper until after it’s been cleaned.  To kind of break that down, there’s a lot of different styles of cloth diapers.  Some of them have a reusable cover option.  Daycare can’t reuse a cover.  They have to put on a new cover every time.  And then the other rule is that it has to go into a double-layer bag, which our wet bags that families use for dirty diaper storage count as a double-layer bag, so they meet the criteria for the Michigan state regulations.

Alyssa:  So you just have to send the double-layer bag and extra covers, and they just throw them in there?

Marissa:  Yep, throw them in there.  You can wash them at home, and then the daycare’s changing the diapers; all you have to do is wash them.  That makes it so easy!  And so many daycares – especially when you bring in an all-in-one diaper, which is a cloth diaper that looks almost exactly like a disposable diaper; it has the waterproof piece and the absorbent piece all sewn together.  You bring that into them, and they’re like, oh, this is what a cloth diaper is like?  There’s no pins; there’s no rubber pants.  And then they’re definitely more open to the suggestion of cloth diapers.

Alyssa:  So there are a lot of different options, and you could even, like you said, if you do want to go cloth 100%, have these all-in-ones for daycare, for Grandpa and Grandma, and then have the other ones with all the different inserts and stuff at home.

Marissa:  What I always tell people is that families who have the most success with cloth diapers usually have three different brands or styles.  Moms usually like one; dads like a different one; grandparents like another one.  Or maybe you love the print of this one, so you have to have it.  And that’s the other thing I tell our parents of newborns is that even if you’re not cloth diapering in the newborn stage, pick up some for newborn pictures because it just makes such a big difference in how the newborn pictures look if they’re in a cloth diaper vs. the disposable diaper.

Alyssa:  Not something that says Pampers on it with a yellow line down the middle.

Marissa:  Right, yeah, you can get dinosaurs or unicorns or sunflowers!

Alyssa:  Awesome!  So tell us one more myth you’d like to dispel about cloth.

Marissa:  Yeah, I would say probably a convenience factor is definitely the biggest thing.  I cloth-diapered both of my kids.  When Olivia, my second child, came out a girl, I was super excited.  I was like, get the purple diaper because we’ve been Team Blue for the last two years.  And I was able to cloth diaper her from birth to potty training, and I never put a disposable diaper on her.  And so it’s totally possible to do.  At the time that Olivia was born, I was a single mom, and so I had two kids under the age of three in diapers.  And it made my life so much easier because I never had a 2am run to Meijer for more diapers.  I was able to cut back on my trash because I didn’t have so many disposable diapers going out into the trash.  I was able to just have my still every-other-week pickup so I saved money that way.  I never had to drag toddlers into the store to go grab more diapers.  If I ran out of diapers, I just washed them.  You know, it was really convenient.  Kind of what we talk about is that you’re going to be changing diapers regardless, and then is it, are you going to have to take the diaper to the garbage or take the diaper to the hamper to wash it?  So the amount of time that goes into it isn’t a huge difference.  We do offer a class at the store, and we do virtual classes, as well.  We’ve had some of our customers deployed overseas, and so we’ll do a Google hangout for our customers like that.  We go over all the different styles, all the different options, and then we cover, you know, a lot of the reasons why people come in to talk about cloth diapers.  I think one of the biggest reasons that always surprises people is that we don’t know how long it takes for a disposable diaper to decompose.  Our best guess is somewhere between 250 and 500 years.

Alyssa:  Good grief.

Marissa:  Yeah, so the disposable diapers being used today are still going to be around when our great-great-great-great-grandchildren are alive.  So a lot of parents will come in, and they’re like, oh, you know, we had this wonderful birth experience; we had all these plans that we wanted for our children, and now we find out how awful, how many chemicals are in disposable diapers; how long it takes for these disposable diapers to decompose.  And sometimes that’s the real reason that people come in to talk about cloth diapers with us.  And so that’s kind of a neat thing to see so many people interested in leaving things better for future generations.

Alyssa:   Absolutely.  So do you have two different types of classes?  You have a class telling people about cloth diapers and what to buy, and then one, once they do buy, the $25 one you talked about last time, where you come in and actually learn?

Marissa:  So everything happens all in one class.  We spend the first little bit of class kind of talking about why people are there, like, what most excites you about cloth diapers?  We talk about things like the fact that cloth diapers overall reduce diaper rash.  We talk about the correlation between asthmatic-like symptoms and newborn disposable diapers.  We just give a lot of facts.  We talk about water usage in the house vs. how much water it takes to manufacture a disposable diaper.  All of that information is laid out.  And then the last half of class is really fun where we talk about the different styles, and we always end the class with what to do about the poop because really, that’s what everyone really wants to know, and that’s when we go over all the styles of, you know, a spray pal vs. liners vs. the different options that are out.  So all one class.

Alyssa:  Excellent.  So good.  Like I told you last time, I wish I would have known about that.  It would have saved me.

Marissa:  Oh, yeah, and the other thing is, too, is that when you get your diapers, you get your laundry detergent; you get your set up – you get us, then.  We don’t just get you set up and then send you out the door and say, okay, happy parenting.  If the cloth diapers aren’t working for you, come back in and see us.  And that’s really where people can get a huge benefit from getting the cloth diapers from EcoBuns vs. what they can get from an online store where they don’t have immediate access.  They get our support; we want people to be successful with cloth diapering if that’s what they want to do.

Alyssa:  So tell me how people get set up for this.  What should they do?  Should they come see you first?  Should they find you online?

Marissa:  Yeah, so you can definitely sign up for the class online.  Our summer schedule is up right now.  For sure, the next month’s schedule is up, but we usually try to do the full summer, too.  So that’s up.  You can sign up for the class right online, or yeah, absolutely, you can sign up in store if you just want to come and check us out first and see all the options that we have.  You can definitely do that in store, as well.

Alyssa:  Okay.  Tell us your website.

Marissa:  Our website is www.ecobunsstore.com.

Alyssa:  Perfect.  Everyone needs to go.  I think you should go check out the store in person.  You’ll probably fall in love with the cloth diapers just by looking at them.

Marissa:  We have a really nice area in the store, even if you already have a baby, we have areas to feed babies; we have a bathroom and changing table, and if you want to come out for the day, Electric Hero delivers to the store, so if you need to have some food delivered while you’re looking, Electric Hero delivers for free.

Alyssa:  Perfect.  Sounds like a lovely afternoon.

Marissa:  Oh, it’s perfect.

Alyssa:  Well, thanks again.

Marissa:  Yeah, thanks for having me on!  It’s always fun seeing you.

Alyssa:  Yeah!  Everyone, check out EcoBuns online, and then you can check us out at goldcoastdoulas.com.  Find us on Facebook, Instagram, SoundCloud, and iTunes.  Thanks for listening!

Podcast Episode #26: EcoBuns Cloth Diapering Read More »

yoga self care

[uncommon sense]: The Importance of Quality Self-Care

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Alyssa recently spoke at an event about the importance of self-care. This is a summary of her conversation. We hope you can take away some good advice about what quality self-care means to you and how to apply it to your busy life!

Self-care has become one of those phrases that we roll our eyes at and say, “Yea, I know I need to take more time for myself. Self-care makes me a better mother, or makes me a better wife, or makes me a more productive employee. Yup.” Then we do nothing about incorporating it into our life.

So I’ve been thinking about this topic, trying to figure out a way to define self-care in a way that makes it relevant to all us busy moms. Something to make us realize that in the midst of all the chaos, it is a MUST!

What are some things that come to mind when you hear self-care? Just think about it for a minute. Most of us think of manis and pedis. Maybe a massage. All that is great but what good does if do if we are only caring for our physical bodies? So we have pretty nails, did that do anything for our peace of mind? Was that quality self-care? Maybe for some. But I think we need to dig deeper into what self-care truly is.

Think about this – The quality of our self-care can determine outcomes. It can take us from where we are now to where we want to go. A pedi can’t do that.

Self-care is your path to well-being. When you take care of yourself you’re happier and you therefore attract help, support, productivity, positive relationships, and positive influences. You thrive. Quality self-care makes you radiant from the inside out. People can feel it and are drawn to it.

When we get “too busy” and overload our schedules, that in turn can have the opposite effect – unhappiness, poor relationships, and even physical ailments like migraines and insomnia.

Think of self-care as your fuel. It’s your on-switch. You have to fuel yourself, nourish yourself, so you’re not running on empty or just running on adrenaline. We all have busy lives, and making time for quality self-care actually gives you fuel to do it more efficiently.

Listen to your body. Think of quality self-care as your prescription. When your body is telling you something, be it mental or physical, ask yourself if self-care would fix it. Because your mind and body are not separate. They are fully connected and when you can relax you mind, your body will follow.

An example of this would be every single time I get a manicure. I was just joking with a friend that a manicure is actually stressful for me. I don’t have the use of my hands so I can’t answer the phone, I can’t check emails, or even just browse Instagram! I’m stuck there, staring at the wall, or the lady in front of me, in silence for an hour. I’m miserable. But my nails look good!

So that’s not quality self-care for me. The physical things we do should also be combined with mental practices and rituals. I think if I made it a ritual to get a mani with a friend, that would be quality self-care for me. An hour spent with a good friend is good for my soul. An hour staring at a wall stresses me out.

What could that practice look like for you? Maybe a float tank. Local peeps, has anyone been to phlot in Eastown? Maybe for you it’s meditating for 10 minutes each morning to set intentions for the day. Maybe it’s a massage or yoga (for me these work)! Maybe it’s working out, or reading your favorite book. All of these are great if they bring you some peace and joy. That’s mental wellness.

So think about all the things you can do for your mental wellness and add that to they physical things you are already doing.

What’s your current self-care ritual? Is it working for you? If so, great! Keep it up. If it’s not working, be open to trying some new things to create a ritual of self-care. Figure out what’s important to you and make it happen. No excuses. Remember, it doesn’t need to be lavish or expensive. It just has to work for you (not anyone else)! Like my example of getting a mani with a friend – the mani still only costs me $30 but now it’s quality self-care at no added expense because I have a buddy with me.

Maybe you like to soak in a hot bath, but can’t shut your brain off. So how about soaking in the tub and calling a friend. Or reading that fiction novel that’s been collecting dust. Or turning on a funny podcast. These are simple mental rituals to add to your physical self-care options!

Ok so how do we implement these mental rituals? First, you have to understand that they are a necessity. Something you must do in order to maintain wellness.

Think of that safety card on an airplane. You’re told to put on your own air mask before you help anyone else put on theirs. Even your children! Why? What would happen to you if you helped everyone else put their masks on and you forgot about yourself? You would suffocate. Without your own mask on, you don’t have the capacity to help others. It’s not selfish, it’s a necessity.

Make quality self-care a non-negotiable. Caring for yourself is not an act of indulgence, remind yourself it’s a necessity. Eliminate any shame and guilt that accompanies your self-care ritual.

Self-care is not selfish. Or maybe it is, and that’s okay!

I want to leave you with a quote from Ghandi:

“I had a really busy day today so I better meditate —- for two hours instead of one.”

 

[uncommon sense]: The Importance of Quality Self-Care Read More »

ecobuns

Podcast Episode #25: EcoBuns Baby Registry

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On this episode of Ask the Doulas, Alyssa talks with Marissa, the owner of EcoBuns, about her boutique baby store.  You’ll also learn about the new opportunity to register for Gold Coast services!  You can listen to this complete podcast episode on SoundCloud or iTunes.

 

Alyssa:  Hello, and welcome to another episode of Ask the Doulas.  I am Alyssa Veneklase, co-owner and postpartum doula at Gold Coast, and today we’re talking to Marissa from EcoBuns Baby & Company.  How are you?

Marissa:  Good, thanks for having me!  It’s such an honor to be on the podcast with you.

Alyssa:  Thanks for coming all the way from Holland.

Marissa:  Well, it’s a beautiful day to drive out!

Alyssa:  Yeah, good drive!  So for those of our listeners that maybe don’t get to Holland very often or have not heard of EcoBuns, can you tell us about your store?

Marissa:  Yeah, so we do have the physical store in Holland, which is great, and we offer a full baby registry at the store, so if you’re looking for anything for your new baby, you’ll definitely want to come out and check out the store.  But for our Grand Rapids friends and friends across the world, we do have an online store as well that people can take advantage of.

Alyssa:  Do you sell more online than you do in the store?

Marissa:  Definitely more in the store.  Our store is very relational.

Alyssa:  In the store!  Oh, that’s the opposite of what I would think.  Most places seem to have a bigger online presence.

Marissa:  Yeah, a lot of baby stores will have a larger online presence.  What we found, though, is new parenting is very relational, and our customers really like coming into the store so we can, you know, give them hands-free shopping by holding their babies while they’re shopping or – you know, being a new parent is lonely, and sometimes just having that face-to-face connection is huge.  So it’s definitely worth the drive to come out to the store from Grand Rapids.

Alyssa:  Yeah, I know with things like baby-wearing and diapering, you kind of like to see and touch and feel and maybe even try something with your baby in it.

Marissa:  Yeah, absolutely.

Alyssa:  So I agree that the hands-on thing is really important.  So tell us more about your registry.

Marissa:  So I am super excited about the registry.  The store is about five years old.  We bought the store five years ago, and when we bought it, it was just cloth diapers.  So a lot of people in the community still see us as just a cloth diaper store, which we are.  We have so much fun with cloth diapers; it’s still one of our main product lines.  But over the last five years, we’ve evolved into this whole store.  Originally it was just cloth diapers, but then we have the baby carriers.  We have feeding products.  We have crib sheets.  We have swaddle blankets.  We have high chairs, activity centers, everything that you would need.  And so with the baby registry, we have so many parents who are like, oh, I want to register for all these great-quality, eco-friendly items; I don’t want my family to go out and buy things that I don’t want.  But we needed to do it in a really cool way.  Being a small business, there’s some challenges with creating a baby registry for a small business, but this last year we just launched a new baby registry where you can actually come in with your smart phone or mobile device and scan items right from the store right to your registry.  So we used to do a paper registry, which was okay, but people have a lot more fun coming in now and actually scanning items.

Alyssa:  It’s kind of part of the fun of registering, like at one of the big box stores.  So now you can do it on your phone?

Marissa:  Right from your phone.

Alyssa:  And I have to assume that it felt a little bit antiquated to do it on paper, right?

Marissa:  Oh, yeah.

Alyssa:  People want to feel like – I don’t know, use their technology.

Marissa:  And it was very time-consuming for both the families coming in to register to have to write everything down, and for us, then, to have to go in and input it to the online store.  So that is the cool thing with the registry is that when somebody comes in and registers, it’s an in-store and an online registry.  So families who have family from out of town, we do a lot of in-store pickups for our – so let’s say a family from Grand Rapids or Muskegon, even, is registering at EcoBuns, and their shower is in Grand Rapids or Muskegon.  A lot of times, they’ll have whoever’s hosting the shower just say, oh, just order online and choose in-store pickup, and then Sarah, who’s hosting the shower, will drive out to EcoBuns.  We have everything in a nice big box for them, gift-wrapped and ready to go.  They pick it up and bring it to the shower.  So we try to make it as easy as possible.  You know, and that’s a lot of things, like why are people registering at big box stores vs. someone like EcoBuns, and it’s a convenience factor.  So we like to let people know that we can make it just as convenient with free shipping or in-store pickup options.  Gift certificates are also available.

Alyssa:  Awesome.

Marissa:  Yeah, so there’s a couple gift certificates that you can register for.

Alyssa:  Yeah, tell us about the newest one!

Marissa:  So we’re really excited about this partnership that we just launched with Gold Coast Doulas.

Alyssa:  Yay!

Marissa:  And starting today, you can now register for a Gold Coast Doula gift certificate at EcoBuns baby registry.  So it’s really neat if you’re definitely wanting to go with a doula service, and you guys offer so many different services.  It’s a really great way, then, to be able to register for it to kind of offset that cost.  So we see a lot of, even, second, third, fourth-time moms say, oh, I don’t know what to register for.  My family wants to gift me something.  Well, you know, a postpartum doulas would be definitely at the top of my list!  So it’s a neat way to be able to offset the cost of that service by adding it to the registry.  So we’re really excited about that.

Alyssa:  Yeah, we’re really excited about it too!  And since it just launched, we don’t really know how it’s going to work, but yeah, postpartum services, and then I can imagine that if they maybe don’t want as many hours as they get, we can use that for anything.  You know, we have classes; we have lactation; we have sleep consults.  I think we’ll probably end up using that for whatever service they may want.  We’re really excited.

Marissa:  We have a full list on our website of the services available, so if you want to go check it out, you can head to the EcoBuns registry and search for Gold Coast Doulas and it will pop up, and you’ll see the full list.  And it will also link back to the Gold Coast website if you want more information on all the fun things that Gold Coast has to offer.

Alyssa:  It’s so exciting!

Marissa:  I know!

Alyssa:  So I love that you have all these options; everything that a mom wants or needs, and they’re all eco-friendly.

Marissa:  Yeah, we try really hard to –

Alyssa:  You’ve done all the research for them.

Marissa:  Exactly.

Alyssa:  Which is huge.

Marissa:  Yeah, yeah.  There’s so much out there.  I always tell people, especially with the cloth diapers; people will come in and they’ll say, oh, I don’t even know where to start, and I’ll say, I own a cloth diaper store and I get overwhelmed on what’s on the internet!  Everyone has opinions; everyone has best practices, and a lot of it ends up being very regional as far as types of water and laundry, and it gets so overcomplicated, and that’s where we say, take a breath.  It’s not meant to be overcomplicated.  Just come in and talk to us.  The cool thing about being a small business is we can change things as often as we need to.  For example, if all of a sudden we have a diaper that the manufacturing changed on it and people hate it, it’s very easy for us to say, our customers no longer like this.  It was cool five years ago, but our customers hate it now; something has better has come out.  So we can kind of move and shift faster than bigger companies can, which is really great.

Alyssa:  Do you educate people about cloth diapering?  Do you have community events?

Marissa:  Yeah, so we do a cloth diaper class.  We actually call it Buns Bootcamp, which is a little play on EcoBuns, and we do that two to three times a month.  It’s a $25 class per couple, so we’ll usually see the partners come in.  We do invite, if a couple is having maybe a grandparent take care of the baby, we invite the grandparents into the class as well.  It’s $25 for the class, but then at the end of the class, you get a $10 off of a $50 or more purchase the day of class.  It’s about an hour long, hour and a half, depending on who’s in the class and how much talking we get into.  And it’s a fun class because it does get really overwhelming, but the class kind of brings it back, and my goal is to make sure that no one walks out with their eyes glazed over, you know, that we’re not doing too much information.  Just enough so that you guys feel educated in your decision that you make.

Alyssa:  I wish I would have known about that.  I wanted to cloth diaper so bad; bought the whole shebang, spend hundreds of dollars, and had zero education, so I gave up after weeks.

Marissa:  And that’s huge.  We have so many parents who say – you know, we’re an email away.  We have a lot of parents email us pictures, like why isn’t this working?  And a lot of times you don’t know what questions to ask, and so we can look at something and say, oh, this button just needs to be here, or this insert needs to go like this, and boom, all the problems are solved.  But, really, we’re the first generation who isn’t going to our parents and grandparents for advice.  We’re going to the internet for advice, and that’s shifted the way that a lot of parents handle parenting decisions, even.  And so it’s nice to have a trusted resource that you can go to who has kept up with modern parenting, who knows the products that are out there, who knows what the current and best practices are, to be able to go to and ask advice.  So that’s huge, and we do that with our carriers, too.  We do free fit checks on carriers purchased from us.  Any time a carrier is purchased from us, it automatically comes with a free half-hour lesson on how to use it.

Alyssa:  So awesome!

Marissa:  You know, so many times, you get a carrier home, and it overwhelms you, and then you throw it back in the box, and you never pull it out because no one taught you how to use it, and we don’t want that to happen.

Alyssa:  It’s amazing.  Okay, so tell me again if someone from Grand Rapids registers at your store, they don’t necessarily want to drive to Holland, you actually do deliver to them?

Marissa:  Yep, so we do shipping.  So we have free shipping on orders over $75, and then we offer first-class and priority shipping, so it’s super easy to get people their products.  And I know the Amazon two-day shipping is huge, but first-class shipping from Holland gets to Grand Rapids in one day, so it gets to everyone really, really fast.

Alyssa:   That’s really awesome.  So tell our listeners where to find you and how to register.

Marissa:  So if you want to come to our actual store, we’re in Holland on the corner on James Street and US 31 in the Holland Town Center.  If you’re familiar with Holland, it’s the old outlet mall with the big orange ropes on them.  So we’re right between Carters and Gap Outlet.  So from Grand Rapids, if you want to just plan a whole shopping day, Carter’s is there; we’re there; Gap’s there.  It’s a great day.  Otherwise, we’re online.  We are at www.ecobunstore.com.  Our store in Holland, though, is open seven days a week, so we’re there Monday through Sunday.  Monday through Friday, we’re there from 9am to 7pm.  Saturdays, 10am to 7pm, and Sundays, noon to 6pm.  And we have Lake Michigan, so it’s definitely worth the drive from Grand Rapids!

Alyssa:  Right, and now it’s beautiful!

Marissa:  And we do offer – so every other month, we have Gold Coast Doulas come out for a really fun Mom’s Night Out, our prenatal edition.  So again another really fun reason to come out to the store.

Alyssa:  Yeah, come meet the doulas and check out the store!

Marissa:  Yeah, absolutely!

Alyssa:  Awesome.  Well, thanks.  We’ll have you on again to talk about – I think we need to talk about cloth diapering and we should talk about baby-wearing.

Marissa:  Yeah, absolutely.

Alyssa:  So we’ll you back on another time.

Marissa:  Awesome.  Thank you so much.

Alyssa:  Thank you so much!  Let us know what you think.  Check out EcoBuns online and then as always you can check us out at Gold Coast Doulas.com.  Find us on SoundCloud, iTunes, and don’t forget to subscribe.  Thanks for listening!

Thanks for listening to Gold Coast Doulas.  Follow us on Instagram, Facebook, and YouTube.  If you like this podcast, please subscribe and give us a five-star review.  You can also check out our Baby Registry Consultation services. Thank you! 

Podcast Episode #25: EcoBuns Baby Registry Read More »

Mompreneur

[un]common sense: Managing your guilt as a Mompreneur

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Today’s blog is written by Alyssa Veneklase – mother, wife, doula, and business owner. She talks about not just mom guilt, but very specifically the type of guilt we have as mothers and business owners. Enjoy!

I worked full-time in an office when I found out I was pregnant, and my assistant at the time was pregnant as well, due a few months before me. She came back to work after a couple months of leave and decided after two hours at work she wanted to quit and stay home with her baby. That was that.

Even though I hadn’t had my baby yet, I knew for certain I did not want to be a stay at home mom. I was going back to work, no question. But I began to feel this sense of guilt. “Am I a bad mom because I don’t want to stay home all day with my baby? Is she a better mom than me because she loves her baby so much she physically can’t be separated from him?” This guilt came from somewhere outside of me – a perceived notion; a very conventional belief that mothers should stay home with their children. But it was not my belief, so why was it making me feel guilty?

I had my baby, went back to work, and everything was great. Except that I began to feel another sort of guilt. I resented my husband for having (what I thought was) an uninterrupted schedule. He still got to go golfing whenever he wanted, meet the boys for a beer without worrying about who was watching the baby… I, however, felt trapped. When I did go out I felt guilty. “I have a baby at home. She needs me.”

It took several months for me to realize that this guilt I felt was my own doing. I was not allowing myself the opportunity for self-care and time apart from my baby. “Why can’t I leave her to go out with my friends more often? Why don’t I get a babysitter so I can have an afternoon alone?” I felt like because I was her mother, I was stuck with this extra responsibility that my husband didn’t have, when in reality he just valued his own time more than I valued mine.

This type of guilt came from a place inside me. It was only mine. I created it, nurtured it, and then took it out on others (namely my husband). It took a while for me to understand, but now I make self-care a priority. I make sure if I want to do something, I do it. No excuses. And I don’t feel guilty about it. I’m still an amazing mom!

So let’s talk about that extra special type of guilt that comes with being a Mompreneur.

If we work from home, we get to play more often…right? We’re lucky because we get to spend all this extra time with our kids while they’re small. Or does it mean we just feel more guilty because we are home on our computers instead of playing with our kids?

For moms with office jobs they are more likely to be able to disconnect when they get home. I mean, we’re never really fully disconnected since our phones are attached to us, but I think the moment we leave the office something happens in our brain that allows us to focus on home. The physical disconnect creates a mental one. Unless you own that office, then going home is just an extension of your office.

When you own your own business, when are you ever able to disconnect? You are the one your employees and clients call. You may be the receptionist, the manager, and the marketing coordinator. You’re the boss.

When you have a newborn at home, you’re on-call for that baby. It doesn’t matter how important the project is you’re working on, baby needs to be fed or held or changed. As our kids get older they’re just as needy, but in different ways.

Even if your child goes to daycare during the day, we struggle to focus on them in the evening because we’re still at work. The phone still rings and the emails keep coming. And we just can’t put down our phones.

The thing that works best for me is to set a schedule and stick to it. If your child is home with you while you’re working, set specific times of the day that you are focused on work only. That means no laundry, no dishes, and no distractions from your child. So… you will need another care-giver there to help.

If your partner is able to help, make sure you set strict guidelines. “I’m working from 9-12, don’t bother me. That means you don’t need to tell me when she’s crying or when she poops. Handle it.”

You can hire a mother’s helper, babysitter, or nanny to help out part time during the day. You can find a childcare establishment that you trust. It’s amazing what you can accomplish in 3 hours without a kid around!

No distractions means no distractions while working, but on the flip side that means no distractions when it’s family time. If you can have dedicated times to focus on work, it should be easier to set work aside when it’s time for family. That means leave your phone in the other room. Don’t check emails or browse Instagram while playing with your kids. Physically separate yourself from it otherwise you will not be able to give them the quality attention they desire.

It’s much easier to focus on your kids when you know your work is done. And it’s easier to get your work done when you’re able to fully focus on your work. A half-ass day of work makes for a half-ass evening with family. You will be distracted. It seems so elementary, right?

The biggest thing I’ve learned from having a baby is it’s okay to be selfish. Being selfish does not have to be a bad thing. There’s still a gender bias that mothers need to be selfless especially when it comes to our children. Why do we have to give up our sense of self, sacrifice our passions, for our children?

Do you think men sit around and talk about Dad guilt? Probably not.

I see a shift happening, especially now with the amazing movements that women are making in politics and leadership roles. We are redefining what it means to be a woman. We can be strong leaders and also great mothers. But do not let this discount the significance and magnitude of our maternal urges. They are real. They will always separate us.

I’m not giving you many specific tips or secret formulas for managing guilt. I think instead I’m asking for a shift in how we see ourselves in our roles, therefore eliminating the guilt and pressures put on us whether by external sources or internal.

When you start to feel guilty, think about what a great role model you are for your kids. You are setting the standard high. They see a strong, independent woman who owns her own business! They see her working hard and providing for her family. I get to see my postpartum clients from an outside perspective, and they often feel guilty and scared and angry, but you know what? They’re doing a lovely job. We are sometimes hardest on ourselves. The fact that you feel guilty sometimes means you’re a good mother and care about the time you spend with your children. And more than likely, you’re doing way better than you give yourself credit for.

So remember you’re a badass Mompreneur! You’re making it all happen and when you start to doubt yourself or feel guilty, take a look at everything you’ve built and feel proud.

 

[un]common sense: Managing your guilt as a Mompreneur Read More »

Cindy's Suds

Podcast Episode #24: Natural Deodorant

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On this episode of Ask the Doulas, Alyssa and Cindy talk about the benefits of using an all-natural deodorant.  You can listen to this complete podcast episode on iTunes or SoundCloud.

 

Alyssa:  Hello, welcome to another episode of Ask the Doulas.  I am Alyssa Veneklase, co-owner and postpartum doula, and today we’re talking with Cindy from Cindy’s Suds again.

Cindy:  Hey, how are you?

Alyssa:  Hello, good.  Good to see you on this beautiful spring day.

Cindy:  Yes, for sure.

Alyssa: So today we’re going to talk about your deodorant, and that comes up because as women become pregnant or even sometimes when we’re trying to conceive, we start to really think about what we’re putting in and on our body, and one of those things we question is deodorant.  Especially because we’re so worried about breast cancer, and you think about the fact that we’re shaving our armpits, and then we’re rubbing deodorant into this freshly shaved skin, which is right next to our breasts with all these lymph nodes, so it can be a scary thing.  And it’s kind of good timing to talk about this because you just rolled out a couple new deodorants.  So I want to talk a little bit about deodorant in general.  What’s the difference between an antiperspirant and a deodorant, and what’s in yours that others don’t have?

Cindy:  Sure.  Well, first of all, I think it’s kind of – everyone talks about their deodorant, and I think a lot of people are assuming that it’s deodorant, but it may actually be an antiperspirant.  So the difference between an antiperspirant and a deodorant is essentially aluminum.  So aluminum is something that is used in regular antiperspirant that you would just pick up on the shelf in any store that you go to, and it’s great because aluminum stops wetness, which is what we all think we want.  We think we want to not sweat; we think we want to prevent any sweat from being seen, and we also think that preventing the sweat will prevent the smell, and sometimes it does, but what also has kind of come to light recently is that your body really needs to sweat.  We’re made to sweat; we need to release the salt and toxins.

Alyssa: Your body does things for a reason!

Cindy:  It does things for a reason!  You and I go back to that over and over; it does that for a reason.  So while it does prevent wetness and maybe odor under the arms, what is being blocked because of that?  It’s to a detriment now that we are blocking that area from sweating.  So they’re finding – more and more research has been done finding that aluminum is definitely linked to breast cancer and also to Alzheimer’s, so those are two really big health concerns.  If you don’t know somebody with breast cancer, you may know somebody with Alzheimer’s.  You could have both in your family, and we also know that aluminum is a cumulative type of metal that builds up in your system and in your neurological system, specifically, and in your tissues, like your lymph tissues, so it’s not like you use it and it gets flushed out.  No, you use it and it builds up.  And it builds and it builds, and so when we start using antiperspirant when we’re 10, 11 years old, and if we use that till we’re 70, 80, we have a lifetime of metal that’s building up in our system, and so that is where researchers are now starting to see, oh, wow, there’s a direct correlation now, and so now they’re trying to come up with some alternatives.  And one thing that you can do is to just use a deodorant vs. an antiperspirant, and so that’s kind of where my soapbox is.  I’m trying to get people to realize that you can eliminate the need for an antiperspirant by using a really good natural deodorant.  Now, having said that, I know you personally have tried many deodorants and have had many deodorant fails, so tell us a little bit about that.

Alyssa: Yeah, you know, I think, too, when I became pregnant, you start thinking about this stuff.  And I’ve tried here and there – nothing ever seemed to work.  You still sweat.  And I knew it; like, I wasn’t using an antiperspirant, so I was still going to perspire.  It’s the odor that gets me.

Cindy:  I don’t want to smell.

Alyssa: Yeah, so the difference, I think, with mine is that – so when I worked in an office, I was up every day.  I showered every day.  Now that I own my own business and I work either from home or from my office, and maybe I’ve just gotten lazier, I don’t shower every day.

Cindy:  Me either!  And it’s not good for you to shower every day!

Alyssa: Yeah, and that’s true, too.  My skin feels better.  My hair feels better.

Cindy:  Well, think about it.  I don’t know – I mean, I’m older than you are, but growing up, people showered or took a bath once a week, and that was just kind of what you did.

Alyssa: I took a shower every day as a kid, and I’m sure I didn’t need to.

Cindy:  I did.  Starting around middle school, I think, is when I started showering all the time, but little kids, you know.  And even my mom.  She took a bath twice a week and that was her routine because that was the routine of her parents.  So we’ve kind of evolved from taking showers or baths once or twice a week to, “You’ve got to shower every day,” and it just strips your body from oils.  But that’s a whole other rabbit trail.

Alyssa: So I was wondering then if I was still showering every day, would a deodorant work better for me because I’d be showering every day?  I didn’t know if I was getting stinky because I just wasn’t showering every day and I was not using an antiperspirant, and it’s not like – when I say stinky, it’s almost like a musk, right?  Every once in a while, I would get a whiff of myself and be like, oh, was that me?  Okay, I better shower tonight!  And my husband was kind enough – I asked him, “Have I been stinky lately?”  And he’s like, “Yeah….”  This was just recently.  So I’m like, okay, maybe I should start using a regular deodorant or showering more, but I don’t want to shower every day.  I really don’t have the time, and my skin just feels better when I don’t.  But I also don’t want to be stinky.  So my compromise lately has been I use a regular deodorant when I have an event or I’m speaking in front of a crowd.

Cindy:  Now, when you say “regular deodorant,” are you talking about an antiperspirant?

Alyssa: Oh, sorry.  Yep, I’ll use an antiperspirant, depending on what I have to do.  I don’t want to be standing up in front of people speaking with wet pits.  So those days I’ll use an antiperspirant, and then days that I know I’m just going to be working or around the house or with my daughter or on the weekends when I don’t have anything important to do, I can just use a natural deodorant.

Cindy:  Yeah.  And now, for me, I’ve been using natural deodorants for about five years or so, but it has taken FOREVER to find one that actually works and I think that’s a frustration with so many of us because they’re not cheap.  They’re $12, $15 a pop.

Alyssa: I have, like, five of them in my drawer.

Cindy:  I know.  I have gone through – I’ve done the same thing.  So I totally get it.  It’s expensive, and it’s a commitment to try yet another natural deodorant.  What sets us apart is that yes, you’re still going to sweat, but what we have in ours is actually kind of the powerhouse in preventing odor, and it’s the addition of probiotics.  So while probiotics are so good for your gut and colonizing the good bacteria so that your body is healthier, your immune system is healthier, we use that same science and we apply it under the armpit.  So we’re actually putting good bacteria under your armpit, so if we’re populating that area with the good bacteria that’s supposed to be on your skin, it’s going to help to eliminate or at least put into better balance the bad bacteria because it’s not that the sweat swells.  It’s that the stinky bacteria smells.  And so it’s not just the dampness.  Sweat doesn’t have an actual smell to it; it’s just salt.  That’s all sweat is.  But once you get that bad bacteria there that happens with dark and dampness, that’s how you get that bad bacteria populating, so we have probiotics in our deodorant to counteract those bad bacteria, get those good bacteria thriving under your armpit, and that is what eliminates the odor.  It’s not the wetness.  It’s the bacteria count, good vs. bad.

Alyssa: So you’d have to use that every day for a while to get that good bacteria built up?

Cindy:  Yes.  So it’s kind of one of those things now – each person’s body chemistry is different, and our body chemistry is constantly changing.  Pregnancy, nursing, time of the month with your periods – you’re constantly up and down with your body chemistry and pH, so it may take a little while, a couple weeks, maybe a little bit longer, for your body to truly adjust.  Now, some people, it takes even longer than that.  Some people can switch over to a natural deodorant, and the next day, they’re like, “Wow, I smell great.”  That’s usually not the norm.  Most of us go through kind of like a wash out, detox.  But I just know that with what we have, it works, and I’m just so thankful that we have a product that works that you can use and feel comfortable about.  I know your population of clients typically are new moms, moms who are pregnant, obviously moms who are having babies, and you may not think about deodorant so much, but I had a customer actually specifically email me and say, “The reason why I’m so bent on using a natural deodorant is because I have my baby’s head right next to my armpit when I’m cuddling my baby or nursing my baby.”  She wanted to make sure her baby was not exposed to the chemicals in an antiperspirant.  And so it was very important to her to have a natural deodorant in that spot where her baby is resting its head, its hands, its mouth.  So she was just really adamant about using our deodorant for that reason, which was eye-opening to me because I didn’t really think about the fact that a new mom may really actively try to find a deodorant that is natural because baby’s right there, right next to the breast, right next to the armpit.

Alyssa: Yeah, I would have never thought of it, either.  You think about lotions because you’re doing skin to skin, but yeah.  Your armpit’s pretty darn close when you’re nursing.

Cindy:  Yeah, so close.  So that was kind of an eye-opener to me when she said that, too.

Alyssa: Well, I have some of your deodorants.  You’re saying I need to try it a little bit longer and not just one time?

Cindy:  Right, yeah, because it is a body chemistry thing, and your body chemistry is changing constantly.  But nine times out of ten, you will get to the point where a natural deodorant is actually working well for you.  We have two different formulas which is also kind of interesting because our standard formula uses baking soda which is great for odor control and a host of other awesome things.  However, some people have a baking soda sensitivity, and I’m actually one of them which is crazy because this is my deodorant.  So for the longest time, I could not use my deodorant because it would give me a rash in my armpit.  And it hurt and it just looked very unsightly.  It was itchy; it was red, and it was caused by the baking soda.  Now, a lot of people actually have a baking soda sensitivity.  I wouldn’t say a lot; a significant amount, maybe 10-15% of the population have a baking soda sensitivity, but you’re not going to know it until you actually are using a natural deodorant for a while, and sometimes it just pops up, just like I said with body chemistry always changing.  You could use a baking soda formula for years and all of a sudden get pregnant, have a weird period, have a hormonal change of some kind, and now all of a sudden you could throw yourself into a sensitivity with baking soda.  We have an alternative, which is our baking soda-free deodorant, and that uses magnesium instead of baking soda.  And the great thing with magnesium –

Alyssa: We’re all deficient!

Cindy:  Right!  I was just going to say that!  So here you’ve got aluminum on one side with the antiperspirant group, and we’ve got baking soda which is our regular, stronger formula, and for our sensitive people, that magnesium, but magnesium’s also a really great odor-controller.  People have actually used milk of magnesia under their armpits.  It’s just sloppy and kind of sticky if you just do that, but it’s that same active ingredient.  It’s just a really great natural deodorant and deodorizer, and so we use the magnesium hydroxide in our baking soda-free formula, so we have you covered on either side of your body chemistry sensitivity.

Alyssa: Interesting!

Cindy:  Yeah.  And another interesting thing, by personal experience – okay, so I couldn’t use our deodorant for a while because of my baking soda sensitivity; switched over to our baking-soda free version for six months, maybe, and now I can use the regular baking soda again.  So who knows if my chemistry was just wonky for a few months, but it’s possible to kind of go back and forth in that continuum because like all things, our bodies are constantly changing, and our body chemistry is constantly changing.  So don’t throw it away, if you have a deodorant that works but you’re maybe getting some baking soda issues.  Do baking soda-free for a while, and see if you can go back and use it six months later, nine months later.

Alyssa: Maybe just once your body has detoxed.

Cindy:  That could be it, too, and each person is so different.  So that’s kind of a cool thing, so we do have you covered on all angles on deodorant, whether you can tolerate baking soda – great, we’ve got three awesome scents.  We’ve got our bergamot citrus.

Alyssa: My favorite!

Cindy:  I know!  Lavender calendula, and then an unscented, and then we have our baking-soda free, which we call our sensitive skin formula, and that will always be unscented just because we’re trying to eliminate anything that you could be sensitive to.

Alyssa: Yeah.  So for those of us who – I would definitely need to try to be a little bit more diligent –

Cindy:  And more consistent because the thing is when you use an antiperspirant, all of your sweat is being blocked, and so you’re not allowing anything to really come through and to release, so if you’re going back and forth between blocking it all and releasing some of it, blocking it all and releasing it, your body doesn’t really know how to adjust, and so there’s typically an adjustment period when you go from an antiperspirant to a natural deodorant, and even if you were a heavy sweater beforehand, you may find that you significantly change as far as how much you sweat after you use a natural deodorant for a while because your body is no longer fighting itself to try to rid itself of toxins.  It realizes, okay, I can have a normal amount of sweat and get out this amount of salt and toxins normally without trying to fight against this blockage that we’ve artificially created with that aluminum antiperspirant.

Alyssa: So I’m thinking – you know, my daughter’s only five, but when she starts going through puberty, what would that look like, starting her on a natural deodorant?  Her body should just kind of be able to regulate itself from the get-go, right?

Cindy:  Exactly, yeah, and teenagers tend to be – because their hormones are so in flux, it may have a little bit of an adjustment, but because they’re starting out right from the get-go without kind of fighting against this artificial blockage that we’re creating, in theory, that should make it a smoother transition because their bodies are learning how to sweat normally from the beginning instead of fighting against this barrier that we’ve created.  And also just think of the years that you’re saving her from that constant aluminum build-up.  So starting out teenagers and preteens right off the bat, giving them only this as an option – so your options are, scent A, B, or C; what do you want to use, vs. this plethora of all these antiperspirants over the counter.  You’ve really got them started on the right foot, and it’s just one more way that you’re helping to keep chemicals out of their body and hopefully give our kids a healthier start than we all had, using all these conventional products when we were growing up.

Alyssa: Absolutely.  I think, if only I had known!  There’s so many things; every time we talk, it’s like, oh, if I would have only known this in my teens!

Cindy:  I know, so true!  But we only know what we know.  So we can’t beat ourselves up for it, and we can now take the information that we have and use it for our families and our children and our friends and especially if you know anybody who’s a breast cancer survivor or anybody who has cancer in general, you want to just really shout out this aluminum-free option as much as you can because you want to try to get – you want to strip everything away that is a potential cancer irritant or that could potentially create any more problems with cancer in their system.

Alyssa:  Yes.  So tell people where do they find your deodorant?

Cindy:  We only sell our deodorant online, so you can only get it at www.cindyssuds.com.  The rest of our products typically are carried around the greater Grand Rapids area and Harvest Health and Kingma’s and a lot of other boutique stores, but our deodorant – we sell a handful of things just online, and our deodorant is one of them, so www.cindyssuds.com is where you find it.

Alyssa:  Awesome.  Well, thank you so much.  I will definitely, starting tomorrow, when I take my shower, use your deodorant tomorrow!

Cindy:  Yes, yes!  And let me know – give us an update!

Alyssa:  I will, I will.  Thanks for listening, everybody.  If you have questions for Cindy, you can email her or look on her website, and you can always email us at info@goldcoastdoulas.com.  Check out our website, www.goldcoastdoulas.com.  Find us on Facebook and Instagram, and remember to give us a rating on iTunes or SoundCloud, wherever you listen.  Thanks, we’ll talk to Cindy again next time!

Cindy:  Thank you!

Podcast Episode #24: Natural Deodorant Read More »